( 1) Rejecting food when there's an issue: Sir,
you gave your wife money for food and after it was
prepared you refused to eat because you are angry. It's one
of the greatest signs of immaturity, it's time to grow up!
You should not even abandon your home for any reason,
you could go somewhere when angry but ensure that you
don't allow it to linger unnecessarily because that is
enough for the
devil to build on.
( 2) Telling your wife severally that you are the head: May I
let you know that even when your wife disobeys/ disrespect
you she still knows that you are the head. You need not
shout or scream it
daily. It's important for you to know when and how to be
firm and put your feet down over issues, however don't
become a nagging husband just to prove that you are the
"(3) Issuing threats: beating, verbally abusing your wife,
issuing threats of divorce or bragging about marrying
another wife does not make you a man. Your strength is in
your ability to tame your
tongue and control your fist. When she is acting her
"childish woman" part, play the "matured man."
"(4) Reporting your wife to friends and family: When your
wife offends you, correct and talk things
through. You don't have to tell everyone about her
mistakes, that will paint her black and sell her cheap such
that you will not be able to redeem her back.
"(5) Keeping malice: is it not funny to know that some men
keep malice? Some of them even nag, criticise,
abuse and call their wives names in public. It may make
you look like a "big boy" who's in control but you are not
going to gain anything good from it, your home will only be
a den of insults and confrontations.
"(6) Not helping with house chores: I must say here that it
is the sole responsibility of a woman to tend and manage a
home. However, it's not a bad thing if a man lends a
helping hand when necessary.
"Watching football with newspaper in your hand every
evening, not caring how stressful the house chores are will
only increase the pressure on your wife and if you truly
care you'll help, just checking on her while busy could
encourage and sooth her, this also makes you a good
example to the kids especially the boys. Some men don't
even say "thank You" to their wives after eating, all they do
is compare her with other women. It's a shame that after
having 3-4kids some men cannot change a simple diaper or
"Lastly, every man should have a church/mosque where his
family is watered and raised spiritually. This makes you
accountable, it's immaturity and dangerous to be a sheep
without a shepherd. As you learn and grow in the right fold,
you'll be able to take the lead as the head of the home....."